I’m Jeff Lung and I Approve This Message
The whispers are getting louder regarding Tony LaRussa’s
controversial plan to have the pitcher bat eighth in the lineup. The idea here is to generate more runs as well as more RBI opportunities for Albert Pujols. Having first seen this implemented with some success
during the ’98 season and used sparingly last year, it appears that TLR will be
more stringent with his approach during the 2008 campaign.
Fear NOT Cardinal Nation! Though this teeters against the baseball machine of purism, I would like
to reassure you that this does indeed work. In fact, to prove it, for the last seven days
I have batted the pitcher in the eight-hole on my MLB 2K6 video game for the
Xbox and the following data has been collected for that stretch:
Record: 8 Wins, 0 Losses (had a doubleheader in one of them
due to a previous rain-out in Cincinnati)
Ave. Runs per Game: 17
Total Runs Scored/Total Runs Against: 157-23
Albert Pujol’s HR total: 13
Pujol’s Total ABs with RISP: Every single time
So, clearly you can see that this is a valid baseball move,
just like the wheel play or the hit and run or the suicide squeeze. Naysayers, shame on you.
And speaking of shame, it appears that the Evil Empire’s
immoral infrastructure has now reached the Governor’s office—well, at least the
man who works (soon-to-be-worked) in
said office. Talk about curveballs, holy geez, who ever saw them comin’!?!
Good Day, Gov’nuh!
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right…