Organ Grinding in Milwaukee
It’s official. Rod Blagojevich has been impeached. Now, you didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to see this coming but it’s funny that one month ago Blago was just another unremarkable midwestern governor and now he’s ready to join the pantheon of famous American pols hoisted by their own petard.
Don’t get me wrong, Blagojevich is no Nixon. He’s smarmy and well-coiffed but his f-bombs and attempted sale of a senate seat hardly compare to Nixon’s Machiavellian machinations which served to undermine America’s trust in its own government for a generation. Nor is the soon-to-be former governor an Andrew Johnson, consistently ranked as one of the worst presidents in history. He really can’t even stand up with the impeached but unconvicted and unsinkable Bill Clinton whose only real crime was his poor taste in women.
However, if Rod can be dispatched of for the mere suggestion of impropriety, this gives me hope. Perhaps we can apply the same standard to the current leader of Major League Baseball, Bud Selig, and hope he suffers a similar fate. To be fair, I’ll grant you that during his tenure baseball has seen both the best and worst of times. Owners are making money hand over fist and ticket sales are through the roof. But ordinary fans can no longer afford to buy those tickets. The lack of a salary cap has allowed teams to spend money like a bunch of drunken sailors (a crime that even my Tigers are guilty of and that Jeff wishes his Cards were capable of) and the strike in 1994 almost killed baseball. As if that weren’t enough, Selig’s chattering and dancing during the steroid era would make an organ grinder’s monkey blush.
The sad fact of the matter, though, is that Selig, just like Blagojevich, has committed no crime punishable by law and will probably get away with the unholiness he has perpetrated against unwitting baseball fans everywhere. The best we can hope for at this point is that he pulls an Eliot Spitzer and is forced to resign. Or maybe one of those sausages will go crazy during the cold Milwaukee winter and beat him senseless with a strip of styrofoam mustard. It could happen.