Impressions Great and Lasting

impeachment trial.jpgSpringfield, Illinois was the epicenter of public embarrassment today as Rod Blagojevich stepped up to the political plate and delivered his most compelling impression of a soulful, hardworking, genuinely honest human being:

“How is it an impeachable offense for helping low income families keep their health?  How can you impeach a governor when what we did was about helping families and kids?”
(image courtesy of the Chicago Tribune)

Uh… I think you are missing the point, Rod, because having something “(bleeping) golden” that you “just don’t give away for nothing” in regards to the vacated Illinois senate seat doesn’t really have anything to do with providing health care for low income families.  But since you brought it up, let it be known that my back hurts like a (bleeping) (bleep) and my (bleeping) health insurance won’t (bleeping) cover a chiropractor so I am stuck in (bleeping) (bleeping) pain while you waste my tax dollars on giving free CTA rides to seniors, threaten to fire Chicago Tribune editors and balloon state debt by borrowing millions of dollars from the future.

Nice try, Rod.

Yet, I tip my hat.  That performance in Springfield today was an excellent, Academy Award worthy acting job that will go down in history as being almost as entertaining as it was pathetic.  I especially liked how you invoked the spirit of the 2 million Illinoisans who elected you twice, Rod — the same 2 million Illinoisans who now want you out of office.

Your dramatic impression of an incorruptible man was one for the record books, indeed.

So in light of this depressing state of Illinois politics, the impending unemployment of the Cubs’ biggest fan and the overall economic bitterness shared by US Americans the world over, let me introduce to you, dear readers, a man who will surely make you smile: Batting Stance Guy.

If you haven’t seen him yet, you should, and in an attempt to inject spunk back into the hearts and souls of taxpayin, apple-pie-eatin’, baseball lovin’ Joe Six-Packs out there, why don’t you enjoy some classic stances from the St. Louis Cardinals:

And in honor of the kind tribute Mr. Krause mustered up last minute (after the fact I must point out), I would like to reach across the aisle and offer you some classic Tiger stances as well:

Man, is he good or what!?! 

Now those are what I call impressions.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m (bleeping) right.

Peace,

Jeffy

P.S.  He Gone!

9 Comments

Oh god, I love the batting stance guy. Hilarious.
McGwire’s.. LOL..
The one he did of the Yanks was pretty funny as well. He saved Paul O’Neill for last… funny stuff. The ’08 All-Stars was also laugh till you cry funny. :)
- V [ http://flairforthedramatic.mlblogs.com ]

I love that Blago is in the same news cycle as Ted Haggert. They deserve each other. But this batting stance guy? I do the same thing in my living room when nobody’s watching, and I’m not nearly as good. Kudos.

- http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

I thought of you Jeffy when I got my CNN breaking news email that the saga had ended and Blago was gone. But what will you have to blog about now??

Julia
http://werbiefitz.mlblogs.com/

Jeff,
I’ve decided that you should work for Jon Stewart or Steven Colbert. They really could use you on their shows. And nice Sarah Palin impersonation.
-Elizabeth
http://redsoxgirl46.mlblogs.com

Ha! That’s great. He nailed Placido. I’m glad that Blago is out of office but I hate to say that this doesn’t mean the sage is over. There’s still a story on the news every $%^&# night about Kwame and he’s in JAIL. The media doesn’t want to let a juicy morsel go.

Now if someone would just sign Manny so we can stop hearing about that and get some new news.

~Katie
tigerfan22.mlblogs.com

That is pretty good. I wonder if he did the Cardinals one before the Tigers. He seemed kind of like he had been doing them for a while when he got to them.

http://statisticianmagician.mlblogs.com/

jeffy why didn’t you think of that you already know all the facts

V — I haven’t laughed til I cried in a long time… or ever?
Jane — Blagohaggert. I like it cuz I don’t like it. Y’feel me?
Julia — Don’t worry, politicians will continue to be idiots. The pool is deep and wide.
Elizabeth — Thanks. Do you know Colbert or Stewart? Holla at ‘em for me if you do.
Katie — We love Kwame too! See: http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/archives/2008/09/speaking_of_losers.html and http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/archives/2008/05/bobblewhat.html for more hilarity.
Joe — Yeah, he has a great backstory… impersonating Rose when he was just a wee boy before he knew what he was doing… right down to the chaw and all.
Baba — Again… what are you talking about?
–Jeff

being the baseball batting stance guy 1st that’s what I mean you goofy

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