Free Agents: Manny & I Are A Lot Alike
Manny is supposedly asking for too much money; but he deserves a multi-year deal. I am supposedly too nice of a guy; she said I “deserve better” so she dealt.
Manny is quirky; you never know what he’s going to do. I am quirky; you know every Saturday afternoon I clean my apartment.
Manny is slow; he looks heavy when he runs. I am slow; I continuously run into and commit to bad relationships knowing they are bad.
Manny plays a crappy left field. I play a crappy left field.
Manny intimidates pitchers. I intimidate women, who are almost as unpredictable as pitchers, so it’s virtually the same thing.
Manny will most likely hold out until he finds the right fit.
I think I will too.
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.