Polish Panache with a Hint of “Arrggh!”

a.j. pierzynski 12.jpgThere is no stat for tenacity, no quantitative analysis for bark, no computation for grindership.

But if there was, you could be damn sure that A.J. Pierzynski would lead the Major Leagues in all of three of them — every year, all the time.

Late in the White Sox game against the visiting Blue Jays Sunday, the score was tied with two men on base when a Jays batter hit a knuckling dribbler down the third base line.  Everyone at Sox Park was thinking the same thing as A.J. while he all-out-hustled after the ball: Let it be foul.

Eventually, the ball found its way over the white lip, into the grass, foul ball.  The crowd sighed in harmonious relief.

But instead of simply picking up the ball, Pierzynski, with his glove, slapped it violently towards the home dugout with the type of ferocity more often seen from 1980s era offensive tackles loaded up on juice.  He let out a hellacious “ARRRGGGHHH!” then stared down the anxious baserunners with that A.J.’s-gonna-kill-you-in-your-sleep-and-eat-your-children-raw glare. 

It was awesome.

Say what you will about A.J. Pierzynski, but with fierceness like that, the dude is an instant and absolute asset to his team.  It’s only April and on every single play he’s grinding like it was Game Seven of the World Series — as if his life, his country, his freedom were on the line.

That’s someone I want on my team — if not for his competitiveness, then for his uncanny foray into the wild world of comedy:

Love him or hate him, A.J. is the Polish Prince of Pertinacity.  You’d have to kill him to make him go away; and if you do kill him, you still better watch out because I bet zombie A.J. would be much scarier, much more lethal than alive-and-breathing A.J.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeffy

19 Comments

I agree with you 100 percent. I hate the guy becuase he is a thron in our side, but I would trade almost anyone on the team for him if availiable.
He is one of those guys, like you say that plays with intimidation.
If Dale Earnhardt was a baseball fan, he would wear an AJ jersey.
I hate that he will do anything to win, even play a fast cheap move on your team, but since there is no replay for things done in the field, only the television audience will know the truth before the umpires.
I have forgien him for the Josh Paul incident years ago, and can now give him props for the Jason Bartlett invisible shoulder toss.
I hate him enough to like his style, but love that he is in the AL Central and not playing us 18 times a year.

Rays Renegade

http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

I love this entry so much. I love the “A.J.’s-gonna-kill-you-in-your-sleep-and-eat-your-children-raw glare” so much. It’s fantastic. And I’d love creepy zombie AJ so much as well. He’s such a gamer and a badass. I love it. People wonder why I love him so much. This post sums up a lot of those reasons. Fantastic!
Jen
http://ajroxmywhitesox.mlblogs.com
PS: That’s the greatest commercial EVER. :)

RR — Wholeheartedly agreed. Don’t forget, the entire city of Anaheim has a bounty out on his head. LOL.
Jen — I knew you’d get a kick out of that commercial. I’ve seen it on TV a million times now and it still makes me laugh… that kid’s face is priceless.
–Jeff

I can’t get enough of that commercial. “Absolutely not.” hahahaha I used to have no opinion on AJ but that commercial makes him awesome. “Is winning a hassle?” hahahaha
Melissa
http://clemsongirlbaseball.mlblogs.com

Great commercial! And of course he is great – he’s Polish! (Did I ever mention that this Irish lass is half Polish??)

Julia
http://werbiefitz.mlblogs.com/

Melissa — “Is winning a hassle?” I know. That’s a keeper line fo sho.
Julia — That explains your unfettered diligence and feisty fanaticism!
–Jeff

My opinion of him would definitely be different if he played for my team, much as my opinion of Jeff Kent was more favorable than that of most fans.

But since he’s not on my team, I hate him.

http://houston.mlblogs.com

Roundrock — Plenty of room in that club. AJ-Haters are everywhere (except for Sox Park, obviously). Though I do think he’s one of those players who people love to hate, unlike Barry Bonds where people just hate him, period.
–Jeff

Oh man, that commercial is hilarious!! Great entry!
http://kaybee.mlblogs.com

Thanks, Kaybee! Keep comin’ back!
–Jeff

“Hey, will you give me hand over here?” LOL.. hysterical..
Thanks for this look into the crazy soul of A.J. Pier-blahblahblah.. Does seem like an intense dude. Would definitely not want to see the zombie version.. fo shizzz, lol.
- V [ http://flairforthedramatic.mlblogs.com ]

Hahaha! Hilarious video and thanks for sharing. AJ is a great guy.
http://hyunyoung.mlblogs.com

V — Fo shizzz. Datz on da rilz.
Hyunyoung — No prob. That’s our lot in life.
–Jeff

Jeff, I thought of you when I read this article in today’s NY Times. In case you didn’t see it…

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/28/sports/baseball/28vecsey.html?_r=1&ref=sports

Enjoy!

- http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

Great article, Jane! Thanks!
–Jeff
http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/

Yeah, I admit it, I still have kind of a soft spot for AJ. I find his antics amusing for the most part, and it would be kind of hypocritical for me to complain now about things he did all the time as a Twin. Plus he was the centerpiece of the greatest trade in Twins history. I just can’t bring myself to hate the guy who brought us Joe Nathan and Francisco Liriano.
Still, I have to say that I’m pretty happy with the guy we have now, though.
-Erin
http://plunking-gomez.mlblogs.com

I can’t stand AJ but I do like that commercial. lol

~ King of Cali
http://kingofcali.mlblogs.com
http://twitter.com/kingcali

Erin — Yeah, I’d say you got the best part of that deal, minus Liriano, of course.
King — Did you like him when he was a Giant? Yeah, I feel ya. That commercial is pretty hilarious.
–Jeff

AJ is the quintessential player that everyone wants on their team, yet they do not want to play against. It’s funny when I go to the Big A in Anaheim, and they still boo AJ for the called third strike in game 2 of the 2005 ALCS. -http://bradcws.mlblogs.com

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