The Filibuster

lady killer.jpgWe all know how much you love the Cardinals. And we all know how
the Julio Lugo trade has left you despondent. But here’s the question.
If you were cast away on a desert island and could choose only one
Cardinal, past or present, to be with you, who would you choose?
 
Harriet S.

Charlotte, NC
__________________________________________

While the human condition often leads us to fantasize about achieving maximum fame — to be known throughout the world as easily as a McFlurry, the Bible or Michael Jackson — the truth is, most of us would be extremely lucky just to get that fifteen minutes everyone talks about.  So when posed with a question of such magnitude, of course, my initial list of suitors would already seem to be set in stone.  My grandfather’s generation would say Stan Musial.  My father’s would say Bob Gibson.  Mine, Ozzie Smith and today’s would most assuredly go with Albert. 

But here’s the thing: with any one of those St. Louis Cardinal icons, there is no question that I would cower from awe, go silent from my insecurities, shy away with humbling woes of unworthiness.  In other words, I would hardly be good company, especially for someone on a deserted island.

Which would lead me to choose that St. Louis Cardinal who isn’t quite the paragon of baseball supremacy — the one who I feel like I could carry on a legitimate conversation with sans all the slobber, the one who all Cardinal fans know, but aren’t likely to jump at spending any hang-time with.  And that man’s name, dear readers, is Fernando Tatis.

fernando tatis.jpgDespite playing in just 300 games for the Cardinals between 1998 and 2000, Tatis is as recognizable a name in St. Louis as Hornsby, Brock and Herzog; and his name is known for one thing and one thing only: making history on April 23, 1999 by becoming the only Major Leaguer to ever hit two grand-slams in the same inning!

Clearly, this accomplishment is almost as intriguing and noteworthy as creating a number one hit single called “Jesus Hates the Cubs”, so I am satisfied that Fernando and I would get along just swell on our little deserted island with plenty of ways to relate.

And considering Fernando’s consistent injury issues, I feel like my role in keeping us alive would be much greater than if I were stranded with King Albert, who might just eat me to make things easier.  Plus, I’m pretty sure I could get my slider by Fernando which would go a long way in keeping my spirits high.

So go ahead and hate me ‘cuz I’m so unpredictable, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

***SEND US YOUR FILIBUSTERS****

Something on your mind?  Want to see Jeff and Al sweat (separately, not together, eww)?  Think you got a real stumper?  Send us your Filibuster question(s) by commenting or emailing them to us at kraulung@gmail.com. 

***Pictures of a skinny Bartolo Colon also welcome but we don’t think such a thing exists.

19 Comments

Jeff,
For me that is an easy question and answer.
It would be Stan Musial, and he better bring the harmonica.
I got to know him as a kid, but did not really get to enjoy him until I hit 10 and read all about him.
Hopefully we can have a shortwave radio and we can chat about the game past, present and future.
I think we could talk enough for two lifetimes before we got rescued.
But then again, the days would fly by, and we could fashion a glove out of palm leaves and a coconut ball.

Rays Renegade

http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

RR — And at Stan’s age, you could probably whoop him if he hogged all the coconuts :-)
–Jeff

Renegade just stole my thunder. I was about to say that if I were stranded on an island with a Cardinal (not my first choice, obviously), I’d pick Musial after hearing him play the harmonica earlier today. He was really good!

http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

It would be more like a Philly ball girl, but since thats not allowed it would depend on how long, if it was going to be a long stay on the island then it would have to be…… Scott Rolen..simply because I would NOT feel bad about killing him for food… oh and…9-2 is all that needs to be said…
Outside the Phillies Looking In
http://devilabrit.mlblogs.com

I’d say Ozzie. He might be able to use his magic to get me off the island. Although Tatis might be able to make a good sandwich. He just has that look.
http://homerfoodandhistory.mlblogs.com/

Tatis is all yours if you want him back.
One thing you can say with relative certainty about Lugo, he can’t be any worse with the Cards than he was with the Red Sox.
http://www.paullebowitz.com/

Jane — He is good at it! He’s a pretty cool dude, but again, I’d barely get a word out: he’s bigger than Jesus.
Devilabrit — *Tear. Funny, we almost like Rolen as much as you… though he did give us his best year (2004).
Homer — Yeah, that deer in the headlights look.
Prince — No, don’t want him back. You keep him. And yes, that’s the saving grace of the Lugo acquisition. Can’t be much worse.
–Jeff

Haha :) Imagine that!! Hey, we have won 4 in a row & have swept the Mariners. & Outscored them quite a bit. Seems they still have something to prove to you. *cough* Jeff.
Hopefully we can win tommorow & break this year’s record.
http://tribechick.mlblogs.com/
-TC

Ok, the thought of being eaten by Albert is giving me a real fun mental picture…thanks :O) LOL

Jenn
http://philliesphollowers.mlblogs.com/

I think I’d like to be stranded with Tyler Greene, he’s cute!-Erinhttp://plunking-gomez.blogspot.com

Are you sure the Julio Lugo you got was the one we were looking to trade? He hasn’t done so bad for you so far.

Julia
http://werbiefitz.mlblogs.com/

TC — I’m all for it… they could start by whooping the Tigers.
Jenn — You’re welcome! Maybe we’ll bring some J-Rol smurfs along, :-)
Erin — You can have him… I think he’s back in Memphis now.
Julia — It’s amazing what the STL can do to a player (an aging Shawon Dunston comes to mind).
–Jeff

I would want you to be stuck with Pujols, so that I could sneak over from the other side of the island, steal him, and leave you with Vicente Padilla.
–Jonestein
http://jonestein.mlblogs.com/

Jonestein — That’s a SCARY thought. Padilla’s on my short-list of ppl I’d NEVER want to be stranded with.
–Jeff

Ok then, how about Padilla, a one year supply of Dharma Initiative supplies, and two nubile natives to be named later? Plus, Padilla has a bitchin Lamborghini I’ll through in for grins.
:^)
–Jonestein

Jonestein — Make him get a haircut and shower three times a day and it’s deal.
–Jeff

Crap! That hygiene thing is a show-stopper every time. Damn, you’re good, Jeff!
–Jonestein

Hey, Jeff…if I’m not mistaken, weren’t Tatis’s 2 GS’s off the same pitcher? You’re absolutely right, Pujols would eat you, but at least he’d kill you and cook you first. Padilla? I’m not so sure.
Lori
http://luckylori.mlblogs.com

Lori — Yes, both of Chan Ho Park. Speaking of GS, you see Willingham go off last night? Wow. What a game!
–Jeff

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