Canadians!

canada.jpgHoly maple leafs, dear readers!

On Friday I fulfilled a lifelong personal dream!

I got to meet Larry Walker!!!

Actually, that’s a lie.  I didn’t meet Larry Walker; but I did meet a very nice Canadian couple wandering the streets of Chicago looking for restaurant suggestions.  The man’s name was Larry.  And since all Canadians look alike, I think we can assume there isn’t much difference between the two.

All fooling aside, let it be known that Canadians are awesome!  Awesome as in “awe” inspiring.  They’re so friendly.  They have funny accents.  And they speak French!

Larry and his wife were so excited to talk to a real life US American (me) that once they got to talkin’, they started revealing all sorts of dark Canadian secrets — information I certainly shouldn’t be privy to.  Oh well.  Part of being a US American is not shying away from free enterprise.  I’m sure Larry and his wife will understand.  So here’s what I learned:

There Are No Death Panels
“We do have to wait in line sometimes for our x-rays and such,” said Larry, “but they certainly don’t make us wait in line during life threatening circumstances.  And if you’re well off like we are, you can go to your own doctor on your own time if you want.  The Canadian system of health care is great.”

Terrance & Phillip Characterizations Are More Accurate Than One Would Think
“We eat a lot of the same things Americans eat,” said Larry’s wife, “but the lower temperatures seem to wreak havoc on our bowels.  We try to avoid Mexican food all together.”

Not All Canadians Live In Igloos
“My brother still lives in one,” said Larry, “but he’s a moose hunter and moose hunters are… well, they’re just a bit off, eh?”

Canadians Think US Americans Are Silly
“George W. Bush?  Really?  You guys voted for him… twice!” said Larry’s wife.  “That’s silly to us.  And you’re always scared.  Fearful.  No one’s going to blow up the Sears Tower.  Chicago isn’t important on the world map.  That’s like saying they’ll blow up the Stade OlympiqueWhy would anyone do that?  Yet so many of you Americans are convinced your local Wal-Mart is the next target.  Haha.”

joe carter celebrating.jpgBut the most satisfying thing I heard from this real-life Canadian couple was the following:

I asked them: “What do you think of when you hear the name Joe Carter?”

Larry and his wife looked at each other and said, in unison, “Touch ‘em all, Joe!”

How can we not love Canadians?  Seriously.

Hate me ‘cuz I get all international on you, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right: Canadians are people too.

Peace,

Jeff

8 Comments

Then again, the “Walkers” (lol…good one) and their blissful opinion of the Canadian health care system might just be wild pigs with the fence long erected around them:

http://passedupstrange.blogspot.com/2009/09/how-to-catch-wild-pigs.html

Yes, I wrote “long erected”.
–Jonestein

Tee hee. Jonestein, I’m glad someone ‘gets’ my loose metaphors. You are a smart one!
–Jeff

Did you ask them why Canadians say “eh?”

- http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

Speaking as a Canadian…thank you for this entry, Jeff.

Hard to explain the “eh”, Jane…but I think we Canadians do it for reassurance, acknowledgement or encouragement amongst our fellow peers and neighbours. Reasonable explanation, eh?

Speaking as a Canadian…thank you for this entry, Jeff.

Hard to explain the “eh”, Jane…but I think we Canadians do it for reassurance, acknowledgement or encouragement amongst our fellow peers and neighbours. Reasonable explanation, eh?

Jonah
http://jonah77.mlblogs.com

Jane — Never thought to ask, but Jonah knows!
Jonah — Thanks for the good word. Sounds reasonable to me!
–Jeff

Jeff-to truelly understand Canadian culture, just rent a copy of ‘Strange Brew’. It’s classic.
I guess I get spoiled living in a border town, where I probably talk to more Canadians than Americans. You can pull into the local Wal-Mart or Casino and find probably just as many(if not more) white lisence plates than blue ones.
The good news? I could drink over there when I was 19. Made college life a lot easier.
So grab an ice cold Molson, and take off, eh.
Mike
http://burrilltalksbaseball.mlblogs.com

Mike — Another thing we have in common. Our destination was Windsor. Ah, those were the days…
–Jeff

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