Three Things You Can Bet On (And Win!)

roulette_wheel.JPGGo ahead.  Live a little.  You know you want to.

Besides, sitting in front of that television watching baseball games and drinking beer all day could be a lot more fun if you just… live a little.  And by live, of course I mean entertaining the idea that some Republicans might actually have some good ideas.

No, that’s a lie.  I’m talking about gambling.  And you know it.

So if you’re gonna gamble, why not gamble on a sure thing… ya know, so it’s not so much like gambling.  And just in case you worried you might have to do some work to find a sure thing, relax.  RSBS and the trusted interns have already done all the work.  So here ’tis, folks, three DEFINITE winners.

Add to your bankroll wisely…

Sure Thing Number 1: Albert Pujols

Uh… hello?  If you haven’t been convinced of Albert’s transcending greatness yet, then you are either a) dead b) communist or c) dead.  And for all you dead commies, know that Prince Albert went 4-5 with two dingers on Opening Day 2010.  Eat it!

paul lebowitzs baseball guide.jpgSure Thing Number 2: Paul Lebowitz’s 2010 Baseball Guide
From one prince to another, let it be known that the most ruthless, best writer you’ve never heard of is back, this time with the 2010 edition of his annual baseball guide.  You can purchase it *here* on Amazon, or find it through his blogspot site or paullebowitz.com.  Dude, if reading The Prince of New York isn’t already a part of your daily routine, then what the hell are you waiting for?  The man knows what he’s talking about and this guide will help you with your fantasy teams and your exotic parlays!  Oh, and you’ll also gain an in-depth understanding of every aspect of all thirty clubs.  Of course, if you don’t check it out there’s always the chance that I might have to break your legs… so… just sayin’…

And finally…

Sure Thing Number 3: Evan Longoria’s Bad@$$ New Era Commercial
Yep.  If you haven’t seen it yet, get ready, ‘cuz this commercial is a man-gasmic (I made that word up so pay me if you use it) trip down to Awesomeville (I made that one up too).  Look, I love the Andrew Bailey, Nelson Cruz, Justin Verlander commercials… and Mauer is good and all… but jeesh, watching Longoria play this adventurous hero who takes his headwear seriously causes me virtual fits in a world where I am loyal to Albert and Albert only.  Good thing it’s all make-believe, or I might be heading to Albert-Rams-A-Louisville-Slugger-Up-My-Toosh-Opolis (I officially made that up too, but you can blame my sickish and oft pedantic colleague, Mr. Krause, for its idiocy).

So, what are ya waiting for? 

Show me the money!

And don’t hate me… ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

13 Comments

I love New Era. That was a funny commercial, too…if he really wore a hat that big on him, he’d be like a rap star. Which in and of itself is pretty funny.

That New Era commercial had James Bond written all over it.

http://dreamer.mlblogs.com/

Funniest part to me is when Longoria found the time to stop and introduce himself to the hottie on the bus. I LOL’d out loud.
:^D
–Jonestein
http://jonestein.mlblogs.com

Cici — That would be funny. Though somethin’ tells me, Evan is more of a country boy.
Switching Jesus — Your name is divine. I think it had Jason Bourne written all over it, which, in turn, had James Bond written all over it.
Jonestein — I know. That was the BEST part. She’s a looker. Evan is layin’ down my groundwork.
–Jeff

See? If he’d been ridin my Trolley, we’d have caught up to that perp.
mike

Ahahahaha! Well get on it, Mike. Get on it!
–Jeff

There’s a reason you’re the Street Boss.
http://www.paullebowitz.com/
http://princeofny.blogspot.com/

Man-gasmic! A genius term! (As are the others.)

http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

And the hottie he catches a ride with on the scoot? Quite the adventure and love the madeupmanjings.
Buz – http://buzblog.mlblogs.com/

Prince — Boo yeah!
Jane — I think it might just work… let me try to overuse it now :-)
–Jeff

Buz — You’re right. It took me three or four times watching it to actually catch that part, but yeah, definitely a highlight.
–Jeff

Hot commercial! I kinda suspected that Awesomeville would include Ybor City, Tampa and the bay. Not to mention the microsecond “hello” to the blonde on the trolley. Classy, Evan!

http://heirloom.mlblogs.com

Very, classy, Randy. Thumbs up!
–Jeff

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