Much Ado About Juan Pierre
See, the thing is… I know a lot about baseball. And that knowledge doesn’t come from some miraculous form of osmosis. No. Ya see, I am happiest when watching multiple games, all at once, as often as possible. So I do that. I do that a lot. Not only that, but I also read a lot about baseball… magazines, columns, websites… I pour over numbers… listen to the experts. I do all of this because I find it to be enjoyable. Some people can do long division in their heads, some can kick a football from 50 yards out… Me? I know a s**tload about baseball.
And that’s just the way it is.
So when someone says something insane and tries to pull it off as empirical fact without any legwork or base acumen from which to draw upon, then I have a real hard time controlling my temper. Think of it this way: if I walked into an operating room and said, “hey, that guy doesn’t need a kidney transplant, just tie that thing to that thing and it’s all good”, somebody would deck me, or at least, get him me the hell out of there.
That’s what happened when dude started talking crazy about Juan Pierre: “Juan Pierre sucks. He can’t get on base. I could find 29 other leadoff men better than him right now.”
Juan Pierre may not be a flashy fella. He may not demand the sexy headlines. But g0ddammit, Juan Pierre is pretty damn good. He’s consistent as hell. He never gets hurt. He led the National League in hits… twice. He led the National League in stolen bases TWICE and led the American League in stolen bases JUST LAST YEAR. He has a lifetime batting average of .298 (which PROVES that the dude gets on base plenty) and he RARELY strikes out!!!
If there were 29 other leadoff men better than him right now I’d paint myself pink and change my name to Suzie.
And don’t hate me… ‘cuz I’m right.