What’s the best way for me to indulge my twin passions of drinking and anything baseball related before the season starts?
Thank you for putting the ball on the tee, Shaun!
Indeed, drinking and baseball go together like politicians and gibberish, and we here at RSBS are no exception. In fact, if it weren’t for this liberating combination of US American pastimes, there would be no Bleacher Bums, no Pirates fans (how could they survive?), no Miguel Cabrera.
So that is why we are proud to team up with Guinness, one of our favorite beers (Mr. Krause and I co-hosted a Guinness keg party in college, no joke) to set a record for the biggest St. Patrick’s Day party EVER!
The big day is getting closer and closer and we want YOU to be a part of it. Unlike an evening with Mr. Krause, the process is simple and non-invasive. All you have to do is follow THIS LINK, verify you’re 21 years of age or older, then click to “join the party”.
MOST IMPORTANTLY, in the “optional code” box, make sure to enter code “REDS“. For each participant using that code, the good folks at Guinness are going to donate $1 to our charity of choice, the Baseball Tomorrow Fund and its Chicago chapter. That’s right. Your commitment to having a good (and responsible) time translates to more balls, bats, gloves and other baseball equipment for Chicago’s youth.
Now ain’t that a good thang!?!?
So if you haven’t done it yet, go do it! Then sit back, crack open a tall can of Guinness and smile knowing you did something good.
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As spring training heats up in the warmer portions of the American south, the north continues to deal with winter and snow. Meadows and fields that might soon host young ballplayers or maybe a backyard game of catch instead look like this:
Nope, wait a minute. Wrong picture. That’s Australia. And that’s not snow, that’s spider webs. Along with millions of spiders. You know, come to think of it, maybe snow isn’t so bad after all.
Santorum and Gingrich both claim Catholicism as their religious raison d’etre. And according to the Catholic church, divorce is a sin. So, even ignoring Mr. Gingrich’s multiple failed marriages and subsequent divorces, both gentlemen would be guilty of sin. How’s that? Well, both of them are completely divorced from reality.
Here’s the deal, maybe Super Tuesday wasn’t so super for Romney and maybe that has given the other candidates’ backers some little hope but the fact of the matter is, Romney is well on his way to winning the nomination. If you want to put this in baseball terms, it’s like it’s August and the Pirates are in their perennial last place position but claim that they’re going to play this out, make some mega trades and hope that by some miracle, the baseball powers will decide that in spite of their record, Pittsburgh will go to the playoffs. That’s just crazy.
But, crazy never stopped anyone from going into politics. Reason and logic no longer play much of a role, either. When you consider that Stephen Colbert’s Super PAC has raised over one million dollars, well, that pretty much says everything.
So, the Republican primary campaign will continue, Romney will end the up the nominee but he’ll be so bruised and bloody by that point that, barring a second recession, Obama will cruise. And where does that leave the Republicans? Just another broken family. Blame it on divorce.
If you haven’t already done so, don’t forget to register for the Biggest St. Patrick’s Day Party Ever and help RSBS raise money to purchase baseball equipment for kids in Chicago. All you have to do is enter “REDS” in the “optional code” box while registering and you’ll not only be part of a World Record, you’ll also be bringing baseball to kids!
I love it when the old timers show up at spring training. Decked out in jerseys that don’t fit and pants that would be better off… well, off (and hopefully replaced by something baggy), seeing them throwing BP and shagging flies always gets me to smile.
So when I heard Kenny Rogers was in Tigers camp I quickly browsed the internets for proof. Though I was surprised to see Kenny has taken on the Prince Fielder diet (good grief, don’t ex-baseballers know about portion control???), I was pleased to see that he still has that gruff go-EFF-yerself demeanor.
Too bad I couldn’t find any recent pictures of his left hand. The last time I saw it, it was pissing me off.
I even searched the YouTubes to see if said hand was still up to its dirty tricks and this is what I found:
Bummer. Couldn’t get a good look. Still, the Jack Daniels is a nice touch, especially for a spring training camp that includes Miguel Cabrera.
Hate me. It’s all good. Just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
(Image courtesy of Brad Galli)
If you were to build the ideal baseball player, you probably wouldn’t come up with Dustin Pedroia. He’s too small and he just doesn’t look like how a ballplayer should look. Likewise, you probably wouldn’t come up with CC Sabathia either. Dude has a huge gut and looks like a whale.
Most likely, if you were constructing the ideal baseball player, you’d come up with someone like Kyle Farnsworth, all six-and-a-half worthless feet of him. Of course, you’d also then be saddled with his contract and seemingly uncanny ability to melt down in important games.
So why is it that Farnsworth is an object of ridicule (at least here at RSBS) while Pedroia is a former MVP and Sabathia is one of the most consistently good pitchers in baseball? Well, it’s the same reason that Jeremy Lin happened in the US of A and could never happen in China. It’s the intangibles that make athletes great and if there’s one thing that we do well in America, it’s the intangibles.
You can have your Yao Mings and your Kyle Farnsworths. Me, I’ll take my Cecil Fielders and David Wells. And I bet you ten yuan I’ll win.
Take it from them! Just take it!
Forget your fickle fossil fuel subsidies, your position on amnesty for illegals, your corporate bailouts! Forget them!
Who cares for your stupid little war on drugs, your ignorant stimulus spending, your silly stem cell debate? Who cares?!?!
If you want to win Super Tuesday, Mr. Politician, take off your shirt, ride a horse and go shoot a stinking tiger!
And if they try to stop you from winning? There is only one thing left to do.
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Of course, the above method may not translate well to the 2012 baseball season. I have tried touting my team as the 2012 World Series Champions already. But it’s not working.
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
It used to be that when people heard the word “Brooklyn,” they thought of the Dodgers and Jackie Robinson. The Bronx has the Yankees and all their history but there was something magical about the Brooklyn Dodgers. However, when Walter O’Malley uprooted and replanted the team about as far away from Brooklyn as you could probably get, it left a vacuum in the borough that had to be filled by something. Unfortunately, that void has been filled by something even more nefarious than the Mets or Yankees. Brooklyn has now become synonymous with “hipster.”
I’d like to see Brooklyn reclaim its past glory. This is the land of Robinson and Koufax but now it has become more associated with this:
No matter how you feel about New York and its boroughs, as a baseball fan that has to make you angry.
So I’m proposing that Jay-Z bring the Dodgers back to Brooklyn. He has already been working on getting the Nets out there so why not the Dodgers as well? Sure, I realize that it will mess up the divisions just as some sense of order has finally been restored. And combining a Brooklyn team with the Mets in Queens and the Yankees in the Bronx would make ESPN just that much more NYC/East Coast focused. But it’s not like LA has done much for the Dodgers.
So, how about it Mr. Z? Will you save Brooklyn (and all of us) from the hipster-pocalypse?
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THE FILIBUSTER settles back into the Sunday slot at RSBS in one week! No matter what the query, send it to RSBSBlog@gmail.com and we’ll let you know what we think.
Just like A.J. Burnett in a Pirates uni, this is going to be ugly, moan-inducing and might even warrant a trip straight to the DL.
New MLB Playoff Format
In short, I like it. It emphasizes winning the division, makes trade deadline trades more suspect and guarantees drama as we enter the postseason. The only thing I can think of that would make this arrangement better is to skip the one game playoff and force each wild card team’s manager to do a keg stand before engaging in a last-man-standing no-holds-barred boxing tournament. My money is on Ron Washington. Cocaine makes ya crrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaazzzyyy!
Bigots Leading the Republican Party
Whether it’s the Pennsylvanian Taliban or the Ditto Führer of Ignorance himself , I’m getting quite tired of seeing Abe Lincoln’s party fall victim to mass idiocy. But I found something that will really cause ‘em to scratch their heads:
Yadier Molina: Five More Years
Halle-FRACKIN-lujah!!! Seriously, I cannot even begin to tell you how happy this makes me. To those outside of the St. Louis Cardinals family, such jubliation may not seem warranted, but let me assure you: this is a grand, grand deal for all involved. Say what you will about Albert’s tenure, Yadier Molina is the absolute heart and soul of the St. Louis Cardinals. And everyone’s happy now. Yadi’s happy. Front office is happy. The fans are happy.
Theocracy hasn’t worked so well as a system of government. Putting aside the cozy politico-religious oligopolies of yesteryear (I’m looking at you, France, and you too, England), today we don’t have to look much further than Iran or Afghanistan to see that basing civil code on religious doctrine leads to a pretty unsavory state of events. Which leads me to ask, how can anyone still be taking Rick Santorum seriously?
Make no mistake, when Santorum (the “man”, not the “frothy mixture“) says that he doesn’t believe in the separation of church and state, what he is really saying is that he thinks US law should be based on the ten commandments. Maybe I’m dense but I don’t see how basing a system of government on the Bible is really all that different from basing a system of government on the Quran or on the Torah for that matter, both of which I’m pretty sure Mr. Santorum is against. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, a fundamentalist is a fundamentalist is a fundamentalist.
Quite honestly, the only place I want to see the church governing anything is when it comes to the brewing of beer. And when I say “governing,” I really only mean allowing monks to keep doing that voodoo that they do so well. If beer can keep you alive while fasting for a month, it obviously has some sort of higher power.
The seperation of church and state exists for a reason and that’s to keep one single person from becoming both the church and the state. What happens when one man becomes both?
He may be the most interesting man in the world but I don’t think I’m ready for him to be running America.
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It’s time for THE FILIBUSTER to settle back in the Sunday slot at RSBS! No matter what the query, send it to RSBSBlog@gmail.com and we’ll let you know what we think.