A 47 Percent Rant
My dubious and oft out of touch with the public colleague, Mr. Allen Krause, shocked the baseball-politico world on Monday when he compared his beloved Detroit Tigers to the stiff stylings of Mitt Romney. Now, lining one’s self up with the far right fed Tea Party and Christian Coalition is one thing, but talking out of one’s posterior in a public forum is another.
Mr. Krause said:
The Cardinals are playing with a ragtag team and no longer have master strategist La Russa at the reigns.
Um… what?
Ragtag? RAG? TAG?
What’s so ragtag about being World Champions? What’s ragtag about Holliday? Freese? Molina?
RAGTAG?!?!
WTF?
Carlos Beltran? Allen Craig? Chris Carpenter?
WHAT IS THIS RAGTAG YOU SPEAK OF, MR. KRAUSE?!?
The only thing “ragtag” about your REIGNING… WORLD… CHAMPIONS… is that they might play this before each game:
Oh, wait. That’s ragTIME.
Like it’s time to grab a rag and wipe up the locquacious mess left by my colleague.
Hate me ‘cuz you can, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
Peace,
Jeff
The Filibuster
What’s your biggest fear?
Mitch
St. Charles, IL
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Right now? Oh, that’s easy…
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
Peace,
Jeff
Jumping Off the Walls from a One-Game Playoff
I like the extra wild card playoff. Obviously. My team (the reigning WORLD CHAMPIONS) are in because of it. But I am not a fan of the umpteen ulcers currently destroying my insides as we face a do or die situation against Kris Medlen and the Atlanta Braves.
To prove it, I was going to post a picture of myself suffering from said anxiety before I realized that doing so would drive people away rather than draw them in, so instead I give you a wet and bouncy Michelle Jenneke.
Go Cards!
Jeff Takes a Bath
One of the things I’ve always appreciated about my buddy Jeff is his ability to admit when he’s wrong. And despite what he may say at the end of every post, there have been plenty of times that he has had to admit to errant predictions or inappropriate accusations.
That doesn’t make it any less refreshing when it happens, though. For instance, his recent mea culpa for getting the AL Central race so wrong came as a breath of fresh air. And if anyone should know about never counting a team out you would think that it would be the guy who supports the Cardinals, a teams whose 2006 season was the ultimate story of lucking into the playoffs and then getting hot at the right time.
Now, I’m a much more cautious person than Jeff. I’m not going to make any wild predictions about the Tigers winning the pennant, much less the World Series. However, the 2006 Cardinals (and the 2011 Cardinals, for that matter) proved that anything is possible and the Tigers definitely have a team that, if everything clicks, could do some damage.
Hey, what could be better than Jeff taking a bath? Or a shower, as it were.
-A
Charlie and the Psycho Factory
To say that this season was disappointing for the Philadelphia Phillies would be an understatement, and many Phillies’ fans put the blame for this season directly on the shoulders of Charlie Manuel. That’s not really too surprising considering the notoriously horrible Philadelphia fanbase and their willingness to scapegoat anyone for the slightest straying from what they consider to be the true path. They’re a horrible cult gone even more horribly wrong. It’s like a bunch of David Koresh’s all got together and made Philadephia their own personal Waco. At this point, we’re just waiting for the FBI to torch the place.
But I don’t think we should feel sorry for Charlie Manuel. Why? Here’s one reason:
Thanks to Young Charlie Manuel’s soothing presence and weather-predictive hinge joints, he remains to this day the world’s only certified Tornado Whisperer.
Yeah, and that’s just the beginning.
Personally, I think the only way this gets better is if Charlie climbs up to the announcer’s booth and sings “Don’t Cry for me, Philadelphia.” I’m pretty sure young Charlie Manuel would do it. Maybe even in Japanese.
-A
State of the RSBS Union, Take 2
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain. There is nothing there. That whole thing about the White Sox winning the AL Central and the Tigers nose-diving at the unlucky hands of my delirious and oft thwarted colleague, Mr. Krause? I know not that of which you speak.
Also, please don’t hate me ‘cuz I was wrong.
And don’t get used to it… me, being wrong that is. It doesn’t happen often. Of course, you already know this.
It’s just that this baseballing… it’s a fickle pastime. One day you’re up, the next day you’re the White Sox.
(Seriously though, the White Sox tanking like this? WTF? How can one team be so bad at fundamental baseball so quickly? I don’t get it.)
Naturally, by falling back into the trend, I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Tigers lose three in a row as the Sox win three in a row. If that happens, just shoot me — but wait until AFTER the one-game playoff.
Meanwhile, bring on the Bravos…
And don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m (usually) right.
Peace,
Jeff
The Filibuster
Are the Giants better off without Melky?
Mark
Oak Park, IL
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On August 15 the Giants were 64-54 after losing to Stephen Strasburg and the Nationals. That same day they found out that they would be losing Cabrera for the rest of the regular season due to a 50-game ban. Since then, the Giants won 27 games and only lost 11 on their way to clinching the division with a couple weeks left to go. Now, there’s no doubt that Cabrera, juicing or not, can hit. In reality, the drugs just made him better. And it’s also pretty evident that he was on track for the NL batting title. But when you look at the record compared to what the expectations were following news of Cabrera’s ban and one thing becomes obvious.
The Giants are a good team.
And they might be even better without Melky.
Look at the numbers. With Melky the Giants were 10 games over .500 and doing well in the West but still not a sure thing. Without Melky this same team is 26 games over .500 as of Friday and simply blew away the rest of the division.
What that tells me is that something changed in the collective psyche of the Giants when Melky got the boot. The knew they could no longer depend on one guy to come up with the clutch hit and, as a result, it has been a whole bunch of guys who have had to come up with the hits and catches. This makes them a team as opposed to a collection of players brought in as a supporting cast for the one star.
I don’t know if the Giants have the magic to make a run this year like they did in 2010. If I had to guess, I’d probably say no since baseball is so wildly unpredictable. But they seem to be coming together as a team more now than they did with Melky leading the charge so anything is possible. Throw in the fact they don’t have to worry about facing Strasburg in the postseason like they did back on August 15 and it means that their chances are just a little bit better.
-A
The Decided Voter
I know I’ve already talked about it but at this time of year, we hear a lot about the “undecided voter.” Here’s the thing, though. This is what an “undecided voter” really looks like:
I don’t know about you but I prefer not to leave my future in the hands of that guy.
You know whose hands I don’t mind leaving my future in? This guy:
Hopefully there are no undecided voters when it comes time to vote Miggy for MVP.
-A
Why I’m Rooting Against the Angels
It’s nothing personal. Really. Halos fans are cool. And when I lived in SoCal, one of my favorite things to do was head on down to the Big A. But this has nothing to do with the Angels or their fans and everything to do with her.
I am over her. I am. We had our good times, and yeah, she broke my heart into a bazillion little pieces, but it’s over now. I’ve been over it.
For a while now.
It’s just that running into her during the playoffs — seeing how shiny and beautiful and happy she is with another man — well, just the idea of it happening like that so fast makes me want to puke. And while I’m sure there will be a time when seeing her prosper will not make me dizzy with envy, that time is not now.
Not yet.
Go A’s!









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