Results tagged ‘ Jimmy Carter ’
Thanking the Carters
Some things just don’t feel right unless they’re together. Like, how can you have pizza without pepperoni? Ok, yes, there is the Hawaiian but that’s a rare exception. Or what about Tom Selleck without a mustache? Catholicism without the pope…..or scandal.
Baseball is the same way but to an even greater degree. In a way, baseball just isn’t baseball without them. But if I had to choose just one thing that completes baseball, I’d say beer.
Now when I first went to games and was old enough to drink, the options were pretty limited. Usually there was Bud, Bud Light, Miller Lite and maybe some sort of local favorite like Old Style. But that has all changed in recent years. When I visit Nats’ Park, I can choose between the regulars or something like Blue Moon. Out in San Francisco one of the vendors had Anchor Steam on draft and that made me very happy.
It makes me wonder who I have to thank for all this malty and hoppy goodness. What brave soul forged a path through uncharted wilderness to make sure that my ballpark experience lived up to my expectations?
The answer will probably surprise you as much as it surprised me: Jimmy Carter.
Yes, the man who is best known for growing peanuts, botching the hostage rescue and overseeing the oil shocks of the 70′s also inadvertently created the conditions for the microbrewery explosion that continues today.
So, the next time you’re at the park, skip the Bud and drink a microbrew for Jimmy instead. If nothing else, it’s definitely better than a Billy Beer.
-A
Lidge in a Historical Context
I have made apologies for Brad Lidge in the past. This is not to say that I am an apologist but rather that I thought the guy deserved a little respect after what he did last year. And maybe he still does. But after blowing his 11th save of the season last night, he no longer gets that free pass from me.
Here’s the problem. Last year, as we all know, he was a perfect 100% in save opportunities. This year, he’s a little south of 75%. Now, .750 would be a great batting average and it wouldn’t even be a terrible completion percentage for a quarterback. But, at this point in the season, the Brad Lidge experiment (which is a great name for a band, by the way) is a miserable failure and the Phillies had better figure out what they’re doing before Lidge blows it for them in the playoffs.
However, I think I can demonstrate this much more convincingly by comparing it to other famous choices and showing what might have happened if they had followed the current Lidge tinged route.
Neville Chamberlain’s War-Time Prime Minister-ship:
When it turns out that Chamberlain is just a little bit off on the whole Hitler as a threat thing despite seizing Poland and annexing the Sudeten-land, the British decide to give him one more chance. As rockets rain down on London, he bravely stands up and proclaims once more, “C’mon guys, Hitler isn’t really trying to invade Britain. He just has to make a good show of it.” On the bright side, Oktoberfest in London becomes a world-renowned tradition.
Jimmy Carter’s Historic Second Term:
Although the rescue of the hostages in Iran doesn’t quite go as planned and despite the oil crisis, America just can’t enough of the Georgia peanut farmer and they send would-be president, Ronald Reagan, back to California to star in a sequel to Bedtime for Bonzo. Carter repays their faith with his famous speech in West Berlin where he kindly asks the Russians to “Please stop being so mean and if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, how about we slowly dismantle this wall.” He then returns home, considers invading Grenada but instead decides to kill them with kindness, sending thousands of jars of Georgia’s finest peanut butter.
George W. Bush’s Re-Election in 2004:
Despite using the pretense of a just war to entangle the US in a war of choice in Iraq and blowing the possibility of paying down the debt with the newly balanced budget handed him by former President Clinton and instead cutting taxes on the wealthy, Americans go to the polls in November of 2004 and send Mr. Bush back to the White House. He returns the favor by further relaxing regulations and sending Americans to the poorhouse in record numbers during the greatest economic downturn since the Great Depression.
Wait a minute, what? That really happened? I was sure it was just a bad dream. Hm, guess that means that whoever faces Philly in the first round has hope after all.
-A
Presidential Picks
The five living US American presidents met earlier this week to discuss their hopes and dreams for the 2009 MLB season.
When asked who they thought would win it all this year, they responded with the following:
Perhaps someone should edumacate Dubya before he leaves the house his daddy got him into for good.
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
Peace,
Jeffy
Red State Blue State
Recent Comments