Results tagged ‘ Mark DeRosa ’

Even More Freakazoids & Oddities: The Always Venerable, Mostly Searchable RSBS

freakazoid.jpgMr. Krause and I have a pretty high reputation to maintain.  Often times we are called upon to give the people what they want, when they want it, at the level at which they want it.  Whether that means providing hot pics of Erin Andrews, hot pics of Heidi DeRosa (yes, Mark DeRosa’s wife) or hot pics of Albert Puj– I mean, hot pics of Jenna Fischer, we do what we gotta do.

But we don’t beat our wives.

Because we don’t have wives.

But if we did have wives, we would not beat them.

I mean, if I did have a wife, I would not beat her.

Unfortunately, I cannot speak on behalf of my colleague, the nefarious and oft-jaded Mr. Krause.  But until he speaks out for himself, we at RSBS (the interns included) will certainly continue on the path towards the truth… so when you search for something, we can provide the answer… sorta.

Recent RSBS Keyword Search Analysis (click to enlarge):

rsbs keyword search screenshot wife beating.JPG

Hate us ‘cuz you can, just don’t hate us ‘cuz we’re right.

Peace,

Jeff

Everybody Breathe; Gaze at the Hottness

diana roberts.jpgWhat did I do yesterday?

Well, let’s see, I did Testosterone Propionate, Methyltestosterone, Clomid, Laurabolin, Nolvadex, HGH, Masteril, Agoviron, Ambosex, Chorvlon, L-Thyroxine, Clomid, Euthyrox, Neo-Hombreol, Maxiolin Elixier and a little bit of Testo-Enant and then I watched David Ortiz go yard against the Oakland Athletics.

Athletics?  Please.  If it ain’t full of Riboxifen it ain’t no athlete.

But who cares anyway?  I’m sick of talking about this and I imagine dear readers are too so let’s talk about something a bit more titillating, shall we?

It is no secret that the merits of baseball relevant beauties have long been a popular subject at RSBS.  From Erin Andrews to Gong Li (somehow related, trust us) to Kendra Andrews, we and our loyal interns always go for broke.  That is why we are happy to announce that the crew at Fantasy Baseball Dugout has launched its 2009 edition of the Hottest Baseball Wives contest.

heidi derosa.jpgAre you salivating yet?

If not, you will be (depending on your preference) and you can watch the video *here* and vote for the hottest baseball wife *here*.  (Ladies, you can participate too; it’s cool.  I promise.)

My vote? 

Heidi DeRosa. 

Hands down. 

Happy Friday!

And don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

(*Images courtesy of Fantasy Baseball Dugout)

A Series of Serious Non Sequiturs

thinking_man.jpgBecause sometimes the world just doesn’t turn in a logical direction…

Tragically, Six Shot Dead in Chicago Over the Weekend…
…Cub fans were quick to blame the absences of a healthy Mark Prior and Kerry Wood.

Guy Tells Me I Should Read His Blog About His Fantasy Baseball Team Because “It’s Awesome”…
…said guy subsequently found not to have been laid since 1998.

Cardinals Make Deal to Land Mark DeRosa…
…he ain’t Matt Holliday; but even Matt Holliday ain’t Matt Holiday anymore.  I like this move, if for no other reason than the fact that it has caused mass hysteria for Cub fans who regret seeing him go to make room for the $30 million .232 hitting Milton Bradley.

Washington Nationals Designate Kip Wells for Assignment…

…because if Dave Duncan couldn’t fix him, no one can (nor cares to)?

Coup Overthrows Honduran President Manuel Zelaya…
…thus proving that the recipe for success in South America is violence… and dictatorship… and coffee.  Lots of coffee.

Cub Fan Heard Slamming White Sox Fan By Referencing the 1919 Black Sox Scandal, Again…

…same fan responsible for blaming six shooting deaths on the absences of a healthy Mark Prior and Kerry Wood.

MLB to Launch Streaming Video of Live In-Market Padres Games…

…this AMAZING feature comes just before you realize that a) the Padres su<k b) there are so many other, more exciting things to do in San Diego like Sea World, Chargers training camp and, of course, Mexico and c) Yes, David Eckstein is that short in real life.

Clint Hurdle Settling in as Analyst on the MLB Netowrk…

…even though his makeup gives him an orangish appearance on television, we shouldn’t focus on the fact that he was just fired by the Rockies, or that since his departure the Rockies have gone on a mad winning streak.  We should be watching Hurdle like we watch the ugly girl at the dance: with a bottle of Jack and a heart full of sympathy.

Republican Governor Mark Sanford Returns to the Office After Screwing Argentinian for 8 Whole Years…
…because apparently having bad taste is a prerequisite to running the state of South Carolina.

And finally…

Nick Green Doing A Great Job As Red Sox Shortstop…

…mostly because his name is not Julio Lugo.

Of course, Green would do a lot better job if he happened to be a healthy Mark Prior or Kerry Wood.

You know this.

So don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

Vexing Developments Explode Inside Cramped Locker-room Havens: Jeff’s Spin

world baseball classic logo.jpg


V
enezuelans

emit

x-rated

intellect.

Not

good.

 

Dominicans

err.

Verily,

even

losing

offers

players

more

escape.

Netherlands

xanax.JPG

Time,

stat!

 

Eventually

Xanax-induced

Panama

lures

own

defeat.

Evacuate.

 

Indeed,

never

said

I‘d

defend

everyone.

 

mark derosa.jpg

Cuz

rightfully

America

must

prevail.

Enter

DeRosa.

 

Little.

Often

criticized.

Known

everywhere.

Recognize!

 

Rollins?

Oh-yeah!

Ostentatious

mamboing!

 

Has

America

vexed

everyone?

Nuff

said.

 

Don’t hate
me ‘cuz I’m right.

 

Peace,

 

Jeffy

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