Results tagged ‘ Paul Ryan ’

Mopping (and Muppeting) Up

Well, that escalated quickly.  Or maybe it’s more appropriate to say that de-escalated quickly.  Seriously, for a team that closed out the Yankees with a 8-1 win, how can you go 20 innings without a run?  If the 2006 loss to the Cardinals was embarrassing, this one will go down in the annals of humiliation.

However, now that we have that out of the way, the focus automatically shifts to the postseason awards.  Of course the big ones that Tigers’ fans are waiting on are the Cy Young and MVP awards but there’s an even bigger award up for grabs this year.

Now, I don’t think it would come as any surprise to readers of this blog that I’m hoping for an Obama win next week.  It’s unfortunate that the American electorate refuses to understand how much worse things would have been without an Obama presidency, and it’s a very real possibility that Willard and Captain Muppet could win this election.

I guess I’ll leave it at this.  Look at what the candidates say and have said.  See who has been consistent and figure out who you can trust.  And then get out and vote.

-A

P.S. One quick question.  Which is worse, getting swept or losing a 3-1 lead in a series?  Either way, I think it’s pretty safe to say that both teams repped by RSBS did a pretty phenomenal job of sh!tting the bed.

The Filibuster

Allen’s Tigers are in the Series and the Cardinals are still trying to earn their bid. If the Cards don’t make it, will you cheer for the Tigers?

Anne
Fort Royal, IN
_________________________

Hold it right there, Ms. Anne from Fort Royal.  Are you insinuating that the Cardinals might not make it to the World Series?  SHAME.  SHAME!  SHAME!!!

Oh the possibility does bring fear into my being, but THIS… IS… WAR!!!

I can not even begin to envision a Cardinals-less World Series, so to postulate me possibly rooting on THE ENEMY seems as blasphemous as using the Paul Ryan marathon calculator to report my times to my peers!

Will I root for the Tigers?  Pssh.  Will I also cut out my own stomach with a butter knife and eat it whole?  Will I also canvas door-to-door for the Republican party thumping a bible in people’s faces?  Will I eat at the Olive Garden?

Hell.  To the NO.

My only focus right now is TONIGHT.  In San Francisco.

This.  Means.  War.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

Have a topic you want to see us Filibuster? Send us your Filibuster questions by emailing RSBSblog@gmail.com or by commenting below.

Where Will Smith and Jayson Werth Come to Play

Man, that sure turned into a dogfight.  Seriously, just a few days ago it seemed like everything was decided and then, BAM, everything’s back up in the air again.  The thing is, we could really be talking about a few different things right now.  It could be Jayson Werth’s walk-off homer in DC to force a game 5.  It could be the two different series going to decisive game 5’s in spite of teams jumping out to a 2 games to none lead in both.  Or it could be the Vice Presidential debate where Joe Biden and Paul Ryan slugged it out like a couple of prizefighters.

In the end it really doesn’t matter which one you choose because no matter what, it was highly entertaining.  Me, I love Joe Biden so it was great to watch him come out swinging.  He didn’t win in a knockout but if you were scoring at home, it’s pretty safe to say he took the match on points.  Which may not be so surprising since this is who he was going up against:

Uh, dude, 1990’s Will Smith wants his outfit back.  The Fresh Prince of Hot Air, if you will.

But getting back to the entertainment aspect, the same goes for the playoffs.  There was drama all over the place and if the next round is half as entertaining as the play-in games and the Division Series, we’re in for some good baseball.  I love October, almost as much as Paul Ryan loves backwards hats.

-A

RSBS Presents: Candidate, Inc.

Just like baseball teams and really any other sports franchise, politicians also are enterprises.  They may not be incorporated in quite the same way and maybe the legal terminology is different but look at the facts.  They have to build a brand around a name.  They want to figure out how to get you, the consumer, to spend your hard-earned cash on whatever it is they happen to be peddling.  They have no trouble floating with the winds of whatever fad has taken the country by storm at a certain point in time.  The sad fact of the matter is that Jimmy Stewart’s Mr. Smith never really existed except for in our collective imagination.

But this is where it gets fun.  Sure, it’s easy to compare different sports franchises with different companies, expounding on their similarities and noting the token differences.  But if politicians are corporations, too, how do they stack up against their private sector counterparts?

Well, luckily for you, RSBS is here to fill you in.  Since we don’t have enough time to go down the list and match up every politician with the business that he most resembles, we’re just going to use the four most important politicians of the moment, the presidential and vice-presidential candidates.  So, without further ado, RSBS presents:  Candidate, Inc.

Barack Obama

We begin with the sitting president and initiator of one of the most formidable marketing campaigns of recent memory, Barack Obama.  His meteoric rise from being born to a single mother to Chicago neighborhood organizer to President of the United States is the American Dream personified.  It hasn’t always been easy and six months ago it seemed that his run had finally come to an end.  But somehow he used his rivals’ mistakes and his own impressive skills to claw himself back from the edge of ruin.  Sound familiar?  It should because it’s pretty similar to the same path taken by one of the companies he saved, General Motors.

Joe Biden

Joe hasn’t always had an easy ride, even if it’s sometimes self-inflicted.  But the man just keeps coming back.  Severe stutter as a child?  Bounces back. Wife and daughter die in a car crash?  Bounces back.  Makes vaguely racist remarks about a fellow candidate?  Bounces back.  Sure, he may not have ended up being number one but vice-president ain’t too shabby neither.  And Joe has his moments.  Remember when he managed to drop an f-bomb on national television?  Or when he basically called the Republicans the reincarnation of Southern plantation owners?  You may not always love him and he may not have come out on top but the man has something.  Kind of like the Ford Motor Company.

Mitt Romney

Moving to the other side of the aisle, we have the scion of a wealthy and well-connected political family who just can’t seem to figure out what that all means.  Sure, he’s ambitious and it’s obvious that he’ll go to all sorts of lengths to win. But what does he really do?  What does he really stand for?  Does he attend NASCAR races to see fast cars driving in circles or to hang out with the team owners?  He’s kind of like Kodak.  Like Kodak, he had all the keys to success but then he couldn’t figure out how to reinvent himself when the paradigm shifted.  He was successful as governor mainly because he worked with the other party and even adopted some of their policies.  And you know what?  It worked!  But then his digital camera moment came along, the Tea Party, and despite having all the advantages, he just can’t seem to put it together.  The way things are going now, Romney appears set to follow in Kodak’s tracks.  I’m pretty sure losing the presidential election would hurt just about as bad as being dropped from the Dow Jones Industrial Average.

Paul Ryan

And finally we come to the baby of the group, the newcomer who in the past two years pretty much has come to define what “Republican” means today.  The “Paul Ryan Budget” plan, the championing of causes close to the hearts of the Tea Party faithful, his anointment as heir apparent and placement on the presidential ticket.  It’s an amazing valuation for a young and relatively unknown congressman.  In fact, it reminds me a lot of another brand that rode to national prominence based on similar parlor tricks.  However, when you ask how Enron‘s stock is faring today, the best you can hope for is a look of awkward questioning as the other person hopes you’re just joking.  It turns out that it was all just smoke and mirrors.  Paul Ryan?  Pretty much the same thing.

In today’s political landscape where corporate cash injections pretty much determine the course of events, it makes sense that the candidates themselves would have to begin acting like corporations in order to succeed.  But since that mindset has become the de facto organizing principle for everything from baseball teams to high schools, chances are we should probably just get used to it.  But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to figure out what kind of businesses we’re dealing with.

-A

Back to Reality

I’ve been pretty focused on the Olympics for the past couple weeks.  I’ve watched enough handball to hold me over for the next four years and realized that men’s basketball is much more fun to watch than women’s basketball.  I’ve seen decathlons, pentathlons and heptathlons.  And the best part was, I used all the Olympic goodness to ignore the silliness of what passes for news in the US as of late.  Well, that’s over.

Now it’s all about Paul Ryan and Chick-Fil-A.

Paul Ryan?  Not really a big fan.  He seems to be a return to the Bush years, years that didn’t really turn out so well for America

Chick-Fil-A?  Well, it’s chicken.  Some people love it, others don’t really care.  Me, I don’t think I’ve ever actually had Chick-Fil-A.  It’s kind of funny.  The only time I ever remember even wanting it was when I was flying through Cincinnati one afternoon.  Everything else just looked nasty so I thought I’d give it a chance.  Except that it was a Sunday so there was no Chick-Fil-A to be had.  Not exactly a point in their favor.

Man, this is going to suck.  I love politics but this race has already gone ugly and the chances of it coming back up out of the gutter are slim.  Even baseball doesn’t seem to have the power to overcome the post-Olympics slump, although I’m still holding out hope.  And if worse comes to worst, there’s always football.  It just won’t be the same without Usain Bolt, though.

-A

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