Results tagged ‘ TBS ’

How to Handle a Hurtling Bat

When an object is hurtling towards you at breakneck speed, you get out of the way.  Or at least that’s what common sense would prescribe.  Like when a broken bat comes flying at your head, you duck behind your video camera and let that expensive hunk of equipment take the blow:

gardner_bat_tbs_camera.jpgBut common sense is not something that comes naturally to all politicians.  They’re brave, they stand their ground but that doesn’t count for much when that broken bat conks them right in the noggin.  For instance, when someone is talking about the First Amendment and you don’t actually know what is in it, you might want to avoid making that obvious:

Some politicians get it, though.  They not only get out of the way, they use their Jedi mind tricks and send it right back where it came from.  Like in New York:

I really have nothing to add except happy Saturday!

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The Evil of the Thriller

craig_sager.jpgWhat could be more spooky than changing locations for a pivotal game 3 on Halloween night? The answer: not much. I think I’d even rather face the terror of national health care than show up wearing Yankees gear in Philadelphia tonight. No matter which side of the debate you find yourself on, the fright of getting dropped from your health insurance because of a pre-existing condition or sending Nana in front of a “death panel” because her health is no longer viable sure beats the horror of beer and hot dog wielding phanatics. 

However, no matter how insane Phillies fans may be, I am hard pressed to believe there is anything more scream inducing than listening to Joe “I don’t even pay attention to baseball anymore” Buck doing the play by play. Although they could have made it even worse by bringing TBS and the corneal abrasion that is Craig Sager in on the act. Even Michael Jackson couldn’t make that outfit look good.

What would be really nice is if just for one night they would bring in a voice that could give the World Series the gravitas it deserves. And since it’s Halloween I think you all know where I’m going with this. Exactly. We should raise Vincent Price from the grave and let him do it. Hey, it worked for Thriller:

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***IMPORTANT PROGRAMING NOTE***

The World Series of Metaphors continues and there’s still time to make your opinion known here, here and here before the results are announced on Monday. Vote people!

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