Results tagged ‘ Twitter ’

Killin’ It In 140 Characters or Less

oliver perez mets tweet.jpg
And thus continues the neverending sobfest that is the post-2008 season New York Metropolitans.

They just… haven’t been the same. 

And now with the Madoff fallout hindering the club financially, I expect we will be hearing a lot of vitriolic critiques, like the one above on Ollie.  Oh Ollie…

I don’t feel sorry for him.

Still, rather than sling crud at those who cannot defend themselves, we at RSBS prefer to just hit below the belt every once in a while.  As long as we draw a laugh out of ya, all is fair.

Hate me, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

*Oh yeah, if you’re not already, follow us on Twitter yo!

Welcome to Ground Zero!

bud_selig_dictator.jpgWelcome to the year of the revolution!  Not yet 1/6 of the way through 2011, we have already seen dictatorships toppled in Tunisia and Egypt while other autocrats stumble to shore up support by various means.  But what about back here in America?  We watch the news and post Facebook messages in support of Egyptians and Tunisians but ignore the totalitarians in our midst.  I for one think it time that we stand up and take back what is rightfully ours.  And like all revolutions, we need to start by chopping off the head of the snake.  Bud Selig must go!

To this end, I offer up the RSBS Twitter feed as ground zero in the revolution.  When Selig takes down the blog to help protect his ill-gotten gains, we still have a rallying point.  And make no mistake, he will try to silence the revolution.  Take a look at the facts. 

At this point Selig has been in power for almost 20 years, two decades in which he fiddled while baseball burned during the ’94 strike and ignored the nearly fatal excesses of the steroid era.  He has reaped the rewards of a fundamentally flawed system even as the popularity of baseball wanes in the face of challenges from the NFL and Nascar (check out Bill Maher’s recent explanation here).  King Bud has abdicated his duty and for that he must go.

Revolution is not simple and sacrifice is required.  However, our sacrifice can also hit Selig and his cabal of cronies where it really hurts: the pocketbook.  How do we do this?  Well, imagine no one showing up on Opening Day, leaving the ballparks were empty while fans mill around outside chanting “Bud must go!”  Sure, it sounds far-fetched but two months ago so was the idea that Hosni Mubarak would be chased out despite holding the reins of the state police and the military in his iron fist.

We know Bud’s sins.  We don’t need WikiLeaks because it’s all out there, plain as day.  We just need the spark that will ignite this conflagration.  That spark is coming and in six weeks it ignites the revolution.  March 31, 2011.  Baseball’s Independence Day.

-A

Highlights from the 2010 RSBS Twitter Reel

rsbs twitter 1.JPGrsbs twitter 2.jpgrsbs twitter 3.JPGrsbs twitter 5.jpg
Follow us at @RSBS !!!

Jeff & Al

The RSBS Podcast, Episode 10: Bud Selig’s Salad… and Other Stuff

rsbs podcast photo 10.jpg

Click ME to Listen!!!

And so in this Podcast…

It’s our monumental TENTH EPISODE, y’all!  Party is the name of the game as Jeff, Allen and Johanna dive into an exciting playoff tempered show including three hallowed memories, two Morgans (Nyjer and the Captain) and one inception… not to mention a whole lot of confusion over a $500 pair of speedos with Albert Pujols’ face on it.  Plus much more, including the Lou Piniella mailbag!  All to make you laughy-time!

Holla!

- – -

Subscribe to the RSBS Podcast by clicking *HERE*

Subscribe via iTunes by clicking *HERE*

*Special

thanks to Keith Carmack — our engineer, director, editor and
all-around sound guru.  Check out
his Undercast podcast and visit his movie-making website Undercard Films if you don’t want him to kick your bum.  Did I mention he is an MMA fighter?  It’s true.  How else do you think Johanna’s face got so disfigured?!?  Lookout!

- – -

MUSIC BY MEQQA <— Download their music it is rad as hell :-)

Recorded Saturday, September 11, 2010

The Filibuster

pakistan.jpgCrippling heat in Russia, killer floods in Pakistan and, as if that
wasn’t enough, every single division race is still up in the air.  Is
it me or has the world gone crazy?
 
Percy

Franklin, PA
_______________________________

Well, Percy, I gotta admit: you sure lost me with the whole Russia and Pakistan thing.  What is Pakistan anyway?  Any relation to pachyderms?  Or pachydermia?  I think one of my sisters has pachydermia.  Sores.  Lots of ‘em.  I think…

I know that I’m a US American, man!  Heck, nowadays, you can just label me as a plain, old ‘Merican.  Stuff my face with apple pie, stick me in front of the tube to watch baseball, let me marry three chicks at the same time and let’s make a damn reality show out of this highfalutin awesomeness!

Has the world gone crazy? 

Yes!

The world has been crazy for as long as I can remember, and it just keeps getting crazier.  I mean, we live in a world where aggressive foreign policies are based on bronze age fairy-tales — a world where Kyle Farnsworth always has a job — a world where the Texas Rangers are running away with the AL Western Division title!

Of course, the world has gone crazy, Percy!  Of course!  Look around!

We live in a world where technocracy trumps physicality — a world where Elisabeth Hasselbeck is seen as an authority on social issues —  a world where I can have 600 “friends”… without ever leaving my apartment… EVER!

Crazy?!?!  More like frightening, Percy!  Frightening!

Ya see, if I could have it my way I’d live on a self-serving farm, surrounded by nothing, accompanied by a sole transistor radio beaming exciting play-by-plays of men laboring in wool uniforms hundreds of miles away while I sip away on barrels of whisky. 

Yeah.  I think I could get by on that.

But this is 2010, Percy.  And 2010 has iPods and Blagojevich and MLB.TV and Glenn Beck and Facebooks and Lady Gaga and Twitters and… and… whaddya call it?  Pakistans? 

Yes, the world has Pakistans.

And Pakistans are crazy.

Hate me ‘cuz I ain’t down with holy wars, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

***SEND US YOUR FILIBUSTERS****

Something on your mind?  Want to see
Jeff and Al sweat (separately, not
together, eww)?  Think you got a real stumper?  Send us your Filibuster
question(s) by commenting or emailing them to us at
kraulung@gmail.com. 

*Information leading to the arrest of Mr. Krause’s imaginary friend, Sal the Tiger Lovin’ Slobberer also welcome.

The RSBS Podcast, Episode 7: Zambrano’s “Elf”-lessness… and Other Stuff

rsbs podcast photo 6.jpg

Click ME to Listen!!!

And so in this Podcast…

Look out, y’all!  The Prince of New York (aka Paul Lebowitz) is back!  Joining forces with Jeff and Johanna, the best writer you’ve never heard of exercises his unfettered angst and admits to whom he’d like to strangle to death.  Lots of heads roll as the guys discuss Carlos Zambrano’s temper, Vicente Padilla’s flopsweat, Mark Prior’s overgrown calves, the Lou Piniella Mailbag and much, much more… all to bring smileys to your faceys!

Holla!

- – -

Subscribe to the RSBS Podcast by clicking *HERE*

Subscribe via iTunes by clicking *HERE*

*Special thanks to Keith Carmack — our engineer, director, editor and all-around sound guru.  And his Undercast podcast is wicked smaht!  I actually ran into his Undercast crew the other day, as they were going to Subway, and I realized Subway couldn’t contain their bad@ssness.  Anyway, their podcast is available on iTunes and is posted regularly at Undercard Films.  Check it out!

Recorded Thursday, August 5, 2010

The RSBS Podcast, Episode 4: Finally, Allen’s Krause… and Other Stuff

rsbs podcast photo 5.jpg
Click ME to Listen!!!

And so in this Podcast…

Dear readers galore FINALLY get to meet THE one, the ONLY, Mr. Allen Krause as he joins Jeff and Johanna to discuss all things urgent, all things necessary.  And it’s all made possible by science.  And hard work.  And Skype.  Judge for yourself.  Among the titillating
topics of discussion: Strasburg as Jesus, the difference between anathema and an enema (it’s important), starting a Pete Rose for US WBC Team Player/Manager petition on Facebook, Gallaraga’s thingy, the Lou Piniella Mailbag and much,
much more!

Holla!

-
– -

Subscribe
to the RSBS Podcast by clicking *HERE*

Subscribe

via iTunes by clicking *HERE*

*Special

thanks to Keith Carmack — our engineer, director, editor and
all-around sound guru.  His Undercast
podcast is the bomb shizzy, by the way.  It’s available on iTunes and
is posted regularly at Undercard
Films
.

Recorded Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Losing to the LOLstros

hunter pence LOLstros.jpgAs a proud paragon of Redbird loyalism, I still pompously refuse to forgive and forget the awful defeat handed to us by the Houston Astros during the 2005 NLCS.  That… was… awful.  I think I went on a two week bender.

I don’t remember.

But I do remember one thing: I do not like the Astros.  So you can imagine my grief, dear readers, as I watched their bid for an 0-162 season come to an end on Thursday… again, against the St. Louis Cardinals.

WTF IS IT THAT MAKES BUD NORRIS SO UNHITTABLE TO THE BIRDS ON THE BAT?!? EH!?!? WELL!?!?!

Whatever.

That one little win (their first win) is just that: one little win.  It doesn’t change the fact that the Astros suck. 

So yeah.

And it’s times like these — when jaded, seething, vexed — that I turn to Japan… for a little glimpse of happy time:

Ah… nothin’ makes me smile like a psilocybin-fueled walking canine with a crowned doll head pushing doggie treats to unmonitored and impressionable little kids.

Happy Friday, Y’all!

Jeff

*Special thanks to Shan for coining (and sharing) the term “LOLstros”, which is effing hilarious (and true). You can follow her on Twitter here: @Shan_Cake

RSBS Investigates: Brett Myers

Dear readers, I present to you photographic evidence that new Houston Astros pitcher, Brett Myers (right), does take the occasional break from beating his wife, Kim (left).  The happy couple is seen here, in the Astros’ clubhouse, during the press conference which welcomed the domestic abuser to the team earlier this month.

brett myers and kim myers astros.jpgThere are no obvious or visible lacerations on Kim’s face, so we are fairly certain that the transition from Philadelphia to Houston was a smooth one for the Myers family.

Though a closer look at this picture does cause alarm for the fairer Myers.  For she somehow allowed her husband to wear a black suit with brown shoes, which if discovered by the loud-mouthed hurler, may spell Kim’s certain extinction.

Hopefully, Brett’s inner idiocy will save us all from such a devastating circumstance.

Hate me ‘cuz I color coordinate, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

(Image courtesy of Astros’ writer Alyson Footer’s Twitter Page; you can read her blog *here*)

From Right Field to the Parking Lot

Jimmy_smokes.jpgAs the postseason awards get handed out and as Yankees fans revel in what 1.4 billion dollars can do for you, those of us cheering for also-ran teams have to sit back and hope for better luck next year. Yep, next year could be the year when Verlander wins his Cy Young, Miguel Cabrera finally walks off with the MVP award and Jimmy Leyland and the Tigers win the Series. It’s not impossible.

But even if this is just a pipe dream, it’s still better than watching the Lions continue to redefine terrible, one loss at a time. We used to have the Pistons but they’re just ordinary anymore. And I suppose there are the Red Wings but I am not nor have I ever been Canadian so that just doesn’t do it for me.

The thing is that the Tigers have all the pieces. They’re just missing that elusive something, that killer instinct that could put them over the top. You don’t put that many Venezuelans on a team and not expect some sort of revolution. Expectations are about all we have these days, though.

This whole process is kind of like that old song about playing right field. You daydream about the ideal situation and everything coming together but then something wakes you up and you face the truth, the terror of a baseball hurtling your way. For me, that something is one of my favorite Twitter streams, Sh!tMyDadSays. And if you scroll down to the tweet on October 8th, you’ll see what I mean. Yep, that pretty much sums it up.

Hope springs eternal, though. And in case you’ve forgotten the song, the kid ultimately ends up making the catch out in right field. Who knows? Maybe next year the Tigers will get the good news that Justin’s dad thinks they deserve. But I’m betting on god taking another dump in the parking lot.

-A

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